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Understanding Conversation
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People Aspect
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Red flags:
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- Don't interrupt.
- Never make people feel stupid - it's on me if they don't get what I say.
- Don't give unsolicited advice - especially during someone is venting.
- Silences are okay at times - don't rush to fill gaps.
- When silences are not okay - non-verbal cues of discomfort or disengagement.
- Avoid one-upping - sharing an experience is not a competition.

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Green flags:
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- Ask questions if genuinely curious or concerned.
- Assume positive intent if something feels off.
- Feeling emotional is a strength - not a weakness.
- Reflect back what you heard.
- Micro-affirmations feels nice.
- Validate feelings before responding with thoughts.

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Topic Aspect
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Red flags:
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- Avoid sarcasm - it's better to be boring than misunderstood.
- Avoid triggering introspective topics - especially in casual or early-stage conversations.
- Steer clear of overly personal or trauma-adjacent questions unless invited.
- Don't dominate niche interests unless shared - recognise when others are losing interest.
- Gossip about absent people erodes trust.

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Green flags:
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- Find common ground topics: shared experiences, light current events, pop culture, mutual interests.
- Use open-ended questions: "What was that like for you?"
- Shift to emotions when stuck: "How did you feel about that?" instead of just facts.